🚨 Beard, Baggage, and Buttigieg: Is This Really the Best the Democrats Can Do in 2028?
Pete Buttigieg wants you to know he’s thinking about running for president in 2028. Again.
This time, he’s bringing a new beard and the same old delusions.
He is dusting off old campaign lists to text small-dollar donors. He is doing marathon-length, right-coded podcasts in the manosphere. He has begun holding in-person events, and on Tuesday, before his first town hall since leaving the Biden administration, Substack video chats. The night before, he had beers at an area brewery with his former presidential campaign staff in the state. – Politico
Pete’s trying to reintroduce himself like the sequel to a movie that flopped the first time—texting dusty donor lists, clinking beers with staff like it’s folksy, and showing up on manosphere podcasts hoping the guys who mock soy lattes will suddenly rally behind a former transportation secretary with a rebrand beard. It’s not a comeback. It’s community theater.
The former mayor of a mid-sized Indiana town and the man who managed to fumble America’s transportation system into chaos during COVID supply chains, airline meltdowns, and East Palestine’s toxic train wreck is now floating his name for the highest office in the land. Why? Because doing a couple of town halls in Iowa is the new fast track to the White House—no achievements required.
Let’s not sugarcoat this: Pete Buttigieg is a walking résumé gap with a fan club in the media.
Case in point?
Buttigieg was asked about an illegal alien accused of killing a mother and her young daughter. His response? A deflection so weak it could’ve been pre-written by a DNC intern. No real plan, no real outrage—just the same hollow talking points we’ve come to expect. If empty platitudes and polite dodges are the strategy, 2028’s already a rerun.
.@PeteButtigieg is asked about criminal illegal aliens, like Kilmar Abrego Garcia, at a town hall in Cedar Rapids today.
“No one person gets to decide that you are a criminal.”
Entering the country illegally is a crime. Also, he’s literally a MS-13 terrorist. pic.twitter.com/f5P7cyynCD
— RNC Research (@RNCResearch) May 13, 2025
That’s the real Buttigieg: polished on the outside, empty on the inside. When pressed on serious issues—like the death of American citizens at the hands of criminal illegals—he defaults to word salad and safe platitudes. It’s all optics, no substance. But if we’re going to talk about substance (or the lack thereof), let’s rewind to the last time he had real responsibility. Spoiler: it didn’t go well.
đź›» From Mayor of Potholes to Secretary of Gridlock
Remember when he was the “next Obama” during the 2020 primary? Yeah, neither do voters. He flamed out early, left his campaign trail of buzzwords and identity politics behind, and landed a Cabinet seat in the Biden administration as a thank-you prize for dropping out.
As Secretary of Transportation, Pete oversaw:
- Historic supply chain failures
- Thousands of grounded flights
- A nearly invisible response to the Ohio train disaster
- A tone-deaf paternity leave during a national logistics crisis
And somehow… this is the guy Democrats are flirting with for 2028?
📰 The Media’s Favorite Empty Suit
It’s no surprise Politico and The New York Times are already laying the groundwork. He gives good soundbites. He checks all the boxes for what the Left thinks Americans want: polished, diverse, wonky-but-approachable. He’s got Harvard credentials and speaks a couple of languages, but can’t seem to speak plain English when people ask about airline refunds.
And now? He’s in Iowa making noise, holding hands with the media while they try to spin his lackluster record into a comeback tour. Politico practically tripped over itself describing his beard as a “fresh look” for a “more seasoned” candidate.
🤡 A Joke, But They’re Not Laughing
This is what it’s come to for Democrats. A man who once lost to a socialist grandpa in the primaries, botched a federal cabinet job, and ghosted his post during multiple crises — but hey, he’s got name recognition and a glamor shot for Vogue. That’s enough, right?
Wrong.
Americans aren’t eager to rewind to Pete’s DEI-era leftovers, either. His obsession with identity boxes and symbolic virtue signaling defined much of his time in the Biden administration. While real crises unfolded—from grounded flights to toxic train derailments—Pete was busy making sure transportation policy had the right pronouns. Voters are over it. The country’s had a taste of what happens when DEI gets prioritized over actual competence, and let’s just say it didn’t land smoothly.
Pete Dreams of a Trump-Free Socialist Utopia
In this clip from Forbes on YouTube, Pete Buttigieg gets tossed a question about trans rights—and true to form, he launches into a rambling monologue that manages to dodge clarity entirely. Then, as if he’s been dying to say it all along, he asks, “What would we be doing if Trump had never been president?” Easy: you and your crew would be steamrolling America with radical social experiments, gender ideology, and soft-core socialism with a shiny DEI wrapper. Watch the video and see how many words it takes Pete to say absolutely nothing.
 No Thank You, That’s Gonna Be A Hard Pass
America’s not itching for a “Mayor Pete Redemption Arc.” We’re tired of cosplay candidates, press secretary platitudes, and bureaucrats who get A+ in talking and F in doing. The only thing Pete’s ever successfully transported is his own ego.
So go ahead, media — keep pretending this is serious. But don’t expect the rest of us to buy what you’re selling.
Of course, if Pete Buttigieg ever did stumble into the Oval Office, you can bet he’d have rainbow flags flying coast to coast—whether voters asked for it or not. Just look at how Salt Lake City and Boise are already sidestepping state laws to slap Pride colors on government property. It’s the kind of performative politics Pete lives for. Here’s how that’s playing out.
Bottom line: If Pete Buttigieg is your party’s great hope for 2028, then Democrats aren’t just out of ideas. They’re out of shame.
For Fun
Pete is a ridiculous candidate, no doubt about it. But knowing the Democrats, I wouldn’t be shocked if they pushed a Buttigieg/Ocasio-Cortez ticket anyway. Sure, he’s just another white guy—but he’s young, coherent, and gay, which is probably enough for them to call it “historic” and pretend it’s visionary.
But just for fun, here are some other suggestions for the Democrats:
- AOC / Jasmine Crockett – Because nothing says executive leadership like two Instagram influencers cosplaying as legislators. Expect lots of filters, little substance.
- AOC / David Hogg – The ticket for when you want zero governing experience but maximum moral lecturing from people who treat every issue like a group project at Oberlin.
- Pete Buttigieg / AOC – The perfect fusion of corporate technocrat and performative radical. It’s like putting soy milk in your espresso and calling it revolutionary.
- Gavin Newsom / AOC – Hair gel and hashtags 2028. California’s aesthetic tyranny goes national.
- Kamala Harris / AOC – A laugh track in human form. One cackles, the other tweets. Policy? TBD.
- Buttigieg / Hogg – A TED Talk meets a TikTok tantrum. Guaranteed to appeal to voters who think yelling is a form of legislation.
At the end of the day, Pete Buttigieg isn’t a serious answer to anything America’s actually dealing with—he’s just the Democrats’ latest shiny object, repackaged with a beard and a buzzword quota. If this is the future they’re pitching for 2028, we’ll take a hard pass—and maybe a drink.
Feature Image: AI-generated Pete Buttigieg with a beard, and edited in Canva Pro
